Sunday, January 22, 2012

Frustrated...

So... feeling a little frustrated on this Sunday afternoon....

I just feel overwhelmed and I feel like there is never a break for the mom.  I did sleep in a little bit yesterday, but why is it that my 'me' time always ends up just being resting or sleeping so that I can function for the rest of the week?

I can't remember the last time I had time to just do something for myself.  Wander the mall.  Get a pedicure.  Even my last hair cut appointment (which is normally 'me' time) ended up with me having the kids there and helping them do their homework while the Drew (my wonderful and amazing hairdresser) was trying to work around them.  I'm even cancelling time with my friends either because I need to work or because I feel guilty because I've been at work and I should be at home.

I feel like I work.  And then I cook and clean.  And I keep the house ready to be shown.  And I sleep.  And maybe I watch some TV (mostly because I am too tired to do much of anything else). 

And then I repeat the above.

And I am grumpy.  (And then I grump at my kids and at my husband and at the whole world, which just adds to the joy of the whole situation)

So right now, I am going to cook some meals for the week.  And I am going to finish the work that I need to get done before tomorrow.  And then I might try to finish putting the laundry away and do a few other chores around the house (the guinea pig cage is waiting rather impatiently for me).  And then, just like usual, another weekend will have gone by where I have had not one minute to do anything that I really wanted to do.

I am trying to Embrace this part of my life, but I just feel like there isn't anything left of me to embrace anyone or anything.

I thought maybe writing this down would make it better, but.... not really.

Good night all.
C

2 comments:

  1. Please take 'me' time, if for no other reason than to show J that being a mother doesn't mean always putting yourself last. One day she will have the choice to have children, or not. If she sees constant frustration, she might formulate her opinion of motherhood around that. Like I did.

    And make them help you with chores! Part of getting a guinea pig means cleaning the cage. Boy do I remember THAT smell. :)

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  2. Yes, take the me time. I read somewhere that men decide to go take a run and then just grab their shoes and go. Women decide to go for a run and then have to self talk themselves into feeling okay leaving the house for the run, "This will be good for my body. I have earned this. It will be quick. Maybe I shouldnt go." And then through the whole run we feel guilty and then feel we owe someone afterwards. LET IT GO! You need that time. You will be a better mom having taken it. Even if it is 10 minutes.

    I need the reminder too.

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